Hello Everyone!
So I know I'm late again with this weeks post, but I was having a hard time with this weeks theme. As you can see the theme is "Vulnerable" and this weeks theme is very different from what we have done in the past. I actually asked for this theme after I saw the Aussie Curves girls do it and thought it would be a great idea to do. But the truth is it's actually really hard to do because there are so many things that make me feel vulnerable and deciding which one to write about is the hard part. So I decided to go with social media, being a blogger, social media is such a big part of it but it also makes me feeling very vulnerable to others and to myself.
So when I decided to create my blog I knew that I was putting myself out there for all to judge. Since I blogged before I already knew that I would get people out there that weren't going to like me but I had never gotten a negative comment before. But when I started this new blog I got my first message that wasn't very nice, it said something like "You are not plus size, why do you claim to be?!" or something around those lines. I deleted it right away because at the time it made me feel bad and I felt attacked. I remember I was thinking about not continuing my blog and I had to talk to some of my friends about it because it upset me so much. But it's good that my friends snapped me out of it and reminded me that I decided to blog for a reason, I enjoyed it and I shouldn't let what others say to get to me. So I had to remind myself that I can't please everyone and blogging was my outlet to be creative and try to inspire others.
Blogging is just one aspect of being a blogger, another is the social media aspect like Instagram. I was scared to join Instagram at first because the vulnerability of putting myself out there seemed more intense then blogging because you had more people part of the circle and some include friends and others that you know. I don't know about you but me blogging isn't something I tell everyone except for only my close friends, so Instagram meant I was going to let way more people know about it and more ways to be judged. But I ended up creating an account and I didn't start posting right away, it took me awhile to feel brave enough to post something. But once I started I realized it wasn't so bad but then I started to compare myself to other and doubt myself.
Blogging is just one aspect of being a blogger, another is the social media aspect like Instagram. I was scared to join Instagram at first because the vulnerability of putting myself out there seemed more intense then blogging because you had more people part of the circle and some include friends and others that you know. I don't know about you but me blogging isn't something I tell everyone except for only my close friends, so Instagram meant I was going to let way more people know about it and more ways to be judged. But I ended up creating an account and I didn't start posting right away, it took me awhile to feel brave enough to post something. But once I started I realized it wasn't so bad but then I started to compare myself to other and doubt myself.
When I first started to doubt myself was when I started hastagging, you know how there are accounts that you can hashtag and they will feature you. Well I remember there was one account that I tried to hashtag and they never featured me and it made me feel like something was wrong. Another incident for example, was when Skorch Magazine wanted to feature girls wearing crop tops, I tagged the few photos that I had of me rocking a crop top and I wasn't featured. I remember checking the hashtag and seeing all the people before me and after me being featured and it was like they skipped me and only me. It made me feel so bad because I felt like I wasn't good enough and started doubting myself. I remember all these things running through my head, all negative thoughts like the picture above. I knew these things were starting to affect me negatively so I decided to change my attitude towards it. I decided I would keep hastagging those accounts and you know what some actually featured me and some still haven't but they have liked some of my photos. So I'm going to continue posting on Instagram and since I changed my attitude I've started to enjoy it.
So this blog doesn't have any pictures and is a lot of writing and is something I don't really talk about and a little more personal. But I wanted to share something makes me a little vulnerable and maybe you can relate or maybe it helps you know me a little better either way it was helpful for me to get it out there. Thank you for taking the time to read this blog post!
"Honesty and transparency make you vulnerable.
Be honest and transparent anyway" - Mother Teresa
Now don't forget to check out the other wonderful ladies from "Curves Around the World" and don't forget to show them some love.
Helen from England - Everyone Should Sparkle
Thulie from South Africa - Thick Fit and Fabulous
Olivia from Singapore - Curves Become Her
Jennifer from Germany - Dressing These Curves
Olivia from Singapore - Curves Become Her
Jennifer from Germany - Dressing These Curves
XOXO ~ Nina ~
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I am a curvy woman myself (size18) and i appreciate everything your saying
ReplyDeletehttp://samellionchameleon.blogspot.com.au/
Thank you for taking the time to read my post. :)
DeleteGreat post Nina! I can relate to what you're saying on many levels. I actually never considered myself plus-size until recently. I rarely wear clothing that is in the plus-size departments because I can wear straight/some petite sizing. In fact, it sort of bothered me at first that some people called me plus-size because I didn't associate myself as that. Since I have started writing for TCF, I've taken more of the identity/role as a petite plus blogger and have decided to embrace that identity. The reality is that if I were a few inches taller and the same proportions, I'd likely fit into most plus-size clothing. But, I've had a few naysayers on TCF who pointed out that I wasn't really plus-size, and that kind of made me feel like I didn't fit in anywhere. Too big to be a petite/straight-size blogger; too small to be a plus blogger.
ReplyDeleteIt's amazing how quick people are to criticize others...others who are brave enough to put themselves out there. Unfortunately, it definitely comes with the "job," but I wish people realized how much we put ourselves out there and that we actually do read the comments that people leave. Maybe then, people wouldn't be so harsh.
Keep up the good work. There are women of all shapes and sizes, and there's a place for all of us bloggers! :-)
Cassie
http://stylecassentials.blogspot.com
I know what you mean Cassie, sometimes I don't know where I fit because I don't fit in straight sizes and I usually fit only the plus size teen clothing because I'm petite. But your right there is room for all shapes and sizes and it just shows the diversity of bloggers. I mean you never know there can be a person just like you not knowing where they fit and when they see you they feel inspired by you. By the way I'm one of them that are very inspired by you Cassie! :)
Deletevery nice post nina, in different ways i can relate at how you felt and the fears you had before putting yourself out there. i m also scared of getting judge, ive had a terrible experience in the past where i was judge by a lot of people and it crushed me. but whats more impt is how i learned to remove the worth of their opinions on me. which is what i see in you :) youre one of the bloggers that i find very encouraging and i hope you keep doing what you no matter what <3
ReplyDeleteAwe thanks Shayne and you are right you need to remove the worth of their opinions and when you do it wont hurt you anymore and wont matter. What matter is to keep positive and do what makes you happy. :)
DeleteI really enjoyed this read Nina! I personally have felt some of the very ways that you discuss! Some may actually feel 'She isn't big ENOUGH to be considered plus size'. Also when it comes to Instagram, I am still somewhat private and do not discuss with everyone that I know about my blog or aspects of blogging. Of course since my account is public, at times they find out and have negative things to say...These experiences are teaching me to focus on the reason that I started blogging, and to allow others to have ownership of their viewpoints without it controlling me and my feelings :)
ReplyDeleteInMyJoi.blogspot.com
Thanks for reading the post Joi and I'm glad you enjoyed reading it! :) But yeah your right you can allow people to have their own points of view but not let it get to you! :)
DeleteThank you for sharing this! I didn't miss the pictures, anyways! I think many of us experience the same vulnerabilities you've shared here; I certainly do! Your hashtag anecdote is spot on. I didn't start using them until a month or so ago, and I'm still hesitant to do so. It certainly broadens your audience, which comes with more feedback, both positive and negative. I will say that my experience blogging has been overwhelmingly positive, and it's helped by having a community of other plus bloggers to interact with. I love getting comments from bloggers I "know" like you because it feels like a relationship, and a supportive one at that. Like you, I don't share that I blog with many people I know in real life. It feels like navigating two different worlds at times. What's funny is that Kyle proudly declares when catching up with family and friends that I'm a fashion blogger and what new developments are going on with it. That's helpful because it's affirming and shows me I make him proud, even when sometimes it feels silly to be blogging about shopping and fashion. Thank you again for sharing your vulnerabilities. I think this is a theme a lot of us can get behind and admit that we struggle with. Solidarity!
ReplyDelete<3 Liz
www.withwonderandwhimsy.com
Yes I totally agree that it helps having a community of bloggers that do comment on your blog and it helps to have them as a little support system you can say. But I think it's amazing that you have have kyle because it's so great how supportive he is of you, a great support system to have! :)
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